Santa Claus Vs Corporate America - Which One Is Real?
We have had several Santa Claus sightings around town recently. From the mall to the coffee shop, our kids have seen a few different Santas. Some looked more the part than others but they all looked different, prompting my six year old to wonder (yikes) how can there be so many different Santas? I found myself having to explain to her why and assure her that indeed, Santa Claus is real and he will be coming down our chimney in just a few short weeks.
As I was thinking more about myths and fairy tales, I thought it would be appropriate to transfer my sleuth slaying over to the corporate world. I feel compelled to let champions in the workforce in on the dirty little secrets of employment, so they can better prepare themselves and not be terribly disappointed when they discover the truth themselves. Similar to my daughter when she finally realizes that the fat man in the red suit was all just a lie, employees will have to be let down easily as well. Hopefully as you read these blog posts exposing the biggest lies your boss is trying to hide from you, you will not feel the pain as much as the retiree who realized it was all just a hoax.
Today we will expose the myth titled “My boss cares about me.”I’m trying to think of the easiest way to communicate this one to you but I may just have to let it rip. First off, no he doesn’t care about you. Your boss cares about your performance, which you may have misinterpreted as caring about you. You see, your boss is compensated based on the aggregate performance level of his subordinates. That birthday card or little note in your mail box is what he learned from his boss. As I mentioned earlier, 99% of leaders are lemmings playing follow the leader. His boss used to give him love notes about his performance so he figures if it worked on him, it will work on you.
By the way, didn’t it feel good? I mean, when you opened a personalized note from your boss, didn’t you feel special? You were like Sally Fields at the Oscars “He really likes me!” Unfortunately, your boss is the one winning the Oscar for best supporting role, hoping like crazy you read that card and get back to work ASAP.
Here’s a funny story. I was at a farewell party for a senior executive a few years back. This guy was as phony and transparent as they come. We planned the party (on a direct order from his office), had videos of the management team wishing him all the best (the videos were like hostage videos you see on TV where people have a gun to their head) and blew most of our operating budget on the party and gifts. At the end, Mr. Executive stood up, visibly moved and full of emotion. He gave a stirring farewell speech thanking everyone from the VP to the janitor. He said “I just want each of you to know how deeply I care about each and every one of you. Please stay in touch – if you’re ever in the neighborhood, stop by and say hello. Please don’t be a stranger.”
Hmm.
Well, being who I am – A guy who takes people at their word, I let some time pass before I sent an email to Mr. Executive saying “…and let’s not let the summer get away from us before we get a round of golf in, I would love to catch up on all the great times we shared together within the organization….”Then the phone call came in. Someone within the organization told me I was playing with fire by emailing Dr Jekyll and he wanted to know what my motives were.
My motives? I thought he asked all of us to stay in touch and call when we were in the neighborhood. I thought he loved me. Didn’t he say he loved me? The liaison between Dr Jekyll and I knew I was a smarta$$ and was trying get his goat. He suggested I not take Dr Jekyll at his word and find another golf partner for the summer.Damn, no golf with the person I thought cared about me the most.Look, I know most employees are trapped like a rat in a cage and feel as helpless as a canine in Mike Vick’s backyard, but at some point you have to call them as you see them. You feel like you can’t tell your boss, or anyone for that matter, how you truly feel about them for fear it may jeopardize your career.
But let me ask you this question. “How much would your boss care about you if his compensation was not directly tied to your performance?”Do you know who does love you unconditionally?
Your family.
So that begs the next question: Why are you giving the least to the people who love you the most? Why do you give all you have at the office and give what’s left to your spouse and children? Your family should not get the leftovers; they should get the good stuff.If you do not start making plans of your own, you will soon become a part of someone else’s plans.
Stand up, take action and begin seizing what’s left of your life - the only one you have been given. I realize it can be terrifying to make plans that are not as secure as a job, but it is ten times more terrifying to look back and think how you fell for the big lie. If the only person you feel can relate to you is Sam Crowley, then start with that ( hey it’s not that bad of a friend and mentor to have). What’s the other option? Live someone else’s dream and make them wealthy?
And one more thing. If you’re ever in the neighborhood, please stop by and say hello – I actually mean it.
You are a champion!
Sam Crowley
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